Classified Humour

These are real Ads:

For Sale: Bulldog. Will eat anything. Loves children.

Thanks to two special people who picked my wife up after a fall from her bike and broke her pelvis and severely damaged her back and many other parts of her body. Jim and Betty Kelleher - there are not enough words to express gratitude and heartfelt thanks for you and what you did for my wonderful wife.

Extremely Indepedent Male. 17 years old, needs to rent room. Call his mother at...

Have Family, would like to exchange for home in Amsterdam.


Or how about this actual transcript of a court proceeding:

Lawyer: When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?

Opposing Lawyer: Objection. That question should be taken out and shot.